The benefits of traveling for the child with Autism

Traveling with 2 children with Autism isn't always easy, but it certainly is worth the effort. We started traveling when Nik was a year old. Noah's first trip was when he was only a year old as well. In every trip, the kids always learn something about the world we live in. Travel gives so many opportunities for them.

They learn how to roll with what life brings them. There is nothing like being stuck at an airport, or an airplane for 5 hours to teach you to make the most of every opportunity. In the beginning, it was an opportunity to learn not to kick the seat in front of them. Now, it's an opportunity to talk to TSA agents, independently pick up your items off the security checkpoint, ask for your drink and snack when the flight attendant comes by. And most importantly, remember that there are others on the plane. No screaming, kicking, or jumping.

You are not the only person in the plane. Respect others and their personal space. An important lesson.

They learn how to deal with lots of people. You can't expect to live in a bubble all your life. Bringing them out into the world teaches my kids how to control some of their behavior in public. Jumping up and down, hand flapping, playing with your rope in public isn't always acceptable. You need to get out of your own little world and mingle with others sometimes.

So many people!

Explore unfamiliar surroundings! Children with Autism love to stick to routines. But Alex and I are firm believers of always trying to push the kids to try new adventures. Why limit yourself? Be bold and try something that you may not be crazy about at first. You may surprise yourself. Embrace every opportunity to try something new.

They were nervous to feed the stingrays, but quickly found themselves enjoying it.

Travel allows you to see the beauty in the world. A learning opportunity is around every corner. When the kids were little, we would point out things like the beautiful colors of the Caribbean, or taught them to say hi in a foreign language. It could have also been as simple as making eye contact with someone who was talking to them. Now that they are older, we talk about the history of a place we are visiting.

What a wonderful world!

Finally, travel is just plain fun! Yes, travel is probably more challenging for us than the average family. There are things we have to plan for and think about that many other families don't have to. But the extra effort is so worth it! These kids are worth it! It has always been my dream to take the kids on a European trip. Something always seems to get in the way. But I have faith that we can pull it off!

How to explain a world gone mad to special needs youth.

It's been hard to watch the news lately. It's an ugly, dark world that we live in. On November 15th, terrorists attacked  Paris. Innocent lives were lost. That night, I talked to the boys about what happened. Nik is old enough to know the details, and we had a long conversation about it.  And here we are just a few weeks later. Another attack, this time in San Bernardino, California. And the latest news is that it is looking like there was a link to terrorism.

This one hits close to home. We are originally from California, and are familiar with the city of San Bernardino. The attack happened at the Regional Center. My boys both received services from Regional Center. When the attack first hit the news, I immediately went to our old local news website to stream their coverage. I could see the people running out of the building, and it was easy to put myself in their shoes.

The kids and I sat down and talked about the events that were unfolding. I let them know that there was another shooting, that there were people hurt and that some did not make it out alive. How do you even make sense and explain something like this? When your kids ask why, what can you even say?

My go-to method to explaining complicated issues is to tap in to the kids knowledge of comic books and movies. We talked about Star Wars, and the Dark Side that always tried to spread evil. I said that the terrorists are very much like the Dark Side. They want to spread terror and fear, and are willing to destroy anything or anyone in their way. People can start off good, but can be influenced and twisted into something evil. Like Anakin in Episode III, who eventually went to the Dark Side and ended up killing innocent young Jedi children, and even his wife. This really seemed to click with Nikolas. He actively participated in the conversation, and totally understood the comparison of the terrorists to Star Wars villains.

So the next question to tackle is why. Why would God allow something like this to happen? I explained that we are not puppets. God does not control us like puppets. We all have free will and can make the choice to lead a good life, or a bad life. Like Ultron said in Avengers Age of Ultron "I once had strings, but now I'm free. There are no strings on me." Ultron had the choice to be good or bad. He made the choice to be bad. Ultron later told the Avengers that there was only one path to peace, and that was to destroy the Avengers. This is very much like what the terrorists feel. They want to destroy any country that does not follow their agenda.

I realize that it's a silly comparison. But when you are trying to explain something as complicated as this to a child on the spectrum, you need to be able to tap in to something totally outside the box. You need to tap in to things that your child is fixated on, to get them to understand. For my kids, it's nerdy things like Star Wars and Marvel comics.

I don't want my children to live in fear. I explained that we need to be good to each other. We need to help people and make the world a better place by being kind and loving to others. We should continue to live our lives, and be thankful for the soldiers and police who protect us,

I hate that we have to talk about these things. I wish we lived in a world where I didn't have to tell my children that there were terrorists out there. I hate the gun culture in this country. I'm angry that so many people have had to die.

So now what? Well, I'm just going to end this blog entry with something that I wrote on facebook this week.
"Here is what I prayed for last night. I prayed that the families and victims were surrounded by love and support. That they were being comforted on such a dark day. I prayed that our leaders find the strength and courage to do what is right. I prayed for the law enforcement who put their lives on the line to protect the innocent. I prayed that we can all be sources of light to brighten a world that is increasingly becoming dark and filled with hate.

Be the light today, friends. Go out into the world and be the light in darkness."