The benefits of traveling for the child with Autism

Traveling with 2 children with Autism isn't always easy, but it certainly is worth the effort. We started traveling when Nik was a year old. Noah's first trip was when he was only a year old as well. In every trip, the kids always learn something about the world we live in. Travel gives so many opportunities for them.

They learn how to roll with what life brings them. There is nothing like being stuck at an airport, or an airplane for 5 hours to teach you to make the most of every opportunity. In the beginning, it was an opportunity to learn not to kick the seat in front of them. Now, it's an opportunity to talk to TSA agents, independently pick up your items off the security checkpoint, ask for your drink and snack when the flight attendant comes by. And most importantly, remember that there are others on the plane. No screaming, kicking, or jumping.

You are not the only person in the plane. Respect others and their personal space. An important lesson.

They learn how to deal with lots of people. You can't expect to live in a bubble all your life. Bringing them out into the world teaches my kids how to control some of their behavior in public. Jumping up and down, hand flapping, playing with your rope in public isn't always acceptable. You need to get out of your own little world and mingle with others sometimes.

So many people!

Explore unfamiliar surroundings! Children with Autism love to stick to routines. But Alex and I are firm believers of always trying to push the kids to try new adventures. Why limit yourself? Be bold and try something that you may not be crazy about at first. You may surprise yourself. Embrace every opportunity to try something new.

They were nervous to feed the stingrays, but quickly found themselves enjoying it.

Travel allows you to see the beauty in the world. A learning opportunity is around every corner. When the kids were little, we would point out things like the beautiful colors of the Caribbean, or taught them to say hi in a foreign language. It could have also been as simple as making eye contact with someone who was talking to them. Now that they are older, we talk about the history of a place we are visiting.

What a wonderful world!

Finally, travel is just plain fun! Yes, travel is probably more challenging for us than the average family. There are things we have to plan for and think about that many other families don't have to. But the extra effort is so worth it! These kids are worth it! It has always been my dream to take the kids on a European trip. Something always seems to get in the way. But I have faith that we can pull it off!

How to explain a world gone mad to special needs youth.

It's been hard to watch the news lately. It's an ugly, dark world that we live in. On November 15th, terrorists attacked  Paris. Innocent lives were lost. That night, I talked to the boys about what happened. Nik is old enough to know the details, and we had a long conversation about it.  And here we are just a few weeks later. Another attack, this time in San Bernardino, California. And the latest news is that it is looking like there was a link to terrorism.

This one hits close to home. We are originally from California, and are familiar with the city of San Bernardino. The attack happened at the Regional Center. My boys both received services from Regional Center. When the attack first hit the news, I immediately went to our old local news website to stream their coverage. I could see the people running out of the building, and it was easy to put myself in their shoes.

The kids and I sat down and talked about the events that were unfolding. I let them know that there was another shooting, that there were people hurt and that some did not make it out alive. How do you even make sense and explain something like this? When your kids ask why, what can you even say?

My go-to method to explaining complicated issues is to tap in to the kids knowledge of comic books and movies. We talked about Star Wars, and the Dark Side that always tried to spread evil. I said that the terrorists are very much like the Dark Side. They want to spread terror and fear, and are willing to destroy anything or anyone in their way. People can start off good, but can be influenced and twisted into something evil. Like Anakin in Episode III, who eventually went to the Dark Side and ended up killing innocent young Jedi children, and even his wife. This really seemed to click with Nikolas. He actively participated in the conversation, and totally understood the comparison of the terrorists to Star Wars villains.

So the next question to tackle is why. Why would God allow something like this to happen? I explained that we are not puppets. God does not control us like puppets. We all have free will and can make the choice to lead a good life, or a bad life. Like Ultron said in Avengers Age of Ultron "I once had strings, but now I'm free. There are no strings on me." Ultron had the choice to be good or bad. He made the choice to be bad. Ultron later told the Avengers that there was only one path to peace, and that was to destroy the Avengers. This is very much like what the terrorists feel. They want to destroy any country that does not follow their agenda.

I realize that it's a silly comparison. But when you are trying to explain something as complicated as this to a child on the spectrum, you need to be able to tap in to something totally outside the box. You need to tap in to things that your child is fixated on, to get them to understand. For my kids, it's nerdy things like Star Wars and Marvel comics.

I don't want my children to live in fear. I explained that we need to be good to each other. We need to help people and make the world a better place by being kind and loving to others. We should continue to live our lives, and be thankful for the soldiers and police who protect us,

I hate that we have to talk about these things. I wish we lived in a world where I didn't have to tell my children that there were terrorists out there. I hate the gun culture in this country. I'm angry that so many people have had to die.

So now what? Well, I'm just going to end this blog entry with something that I wrote on facebook this week.
"Here is what I prayed for last night. I prayed that the families and victims were surrounded by love and support. That they were being comforted on such a dark day. I prayed that our leaders find the strength and courage to do what is right. I prayed for the law enforcement who put their lives on the line to protect the innocent. I prayed that we can all be sources of light to brighten a world that is increasingly becoming dark and filled with hate.

Be the light today, friends. Go out into the world and be the light in darkness."

It's Bigger on the Inside. Turning Doctor Who in to a life lesson.

Nik headed to Homecoming!

This house is the Doctor Who house. The kids love the show. We have made a habit to sit around the TV every Saturday night and watch the latest episode. Nik in particular, seems to really love this show. He loves a good adventure. And series 9 of Doctor Who couldn't have come at a better time, as it ended up inspiring Nik to go outside his comfort level.

"Let me tell you about scared. Your heart is beating so hard -- I can feel it through your hands! There's so much blood and oxygen pumping through your brain, it's like rocket fuel. Right now, you could run faster and you could fight harder. You can jump higher than ever in your life. And you are so alert, it's like you can slow down time. What's wrong with scared? Scared is a super power! It's your super power!" - The Twelfth Doctor

Now some would argue that this is just a silly TV show. But there are some real learning opportunities here. The quote above came from the most recent doctor. Fear and anxiety is something that can take over with my kids. We constantly work at getting them to move past their anxiety. I love how the particular episode explained that you can use this fear to your advantage. In fact, it can be your super power. Here is how we turned an episode of Doctor Who in to a life lesson.

Last month, I received an e-mail from Nik's teacher. She explained that the peer tutors all wanted to get together and ask his special ed class to the homecoming dance. I was pretty excited, because I knew that Nik would never ask anyone to the dance on his own. The anxiety would get the best of him. Going to the dance would be unfamiliar territory. Home was safe. He likes home. 

So when the weeks passed, and I never heard Nik talk about the dance, I asked him about it. He said that someone did ask. Now, he had a big smile on his face. I could tell that he was genuinely happy that someone would think to ask him. So I was totally shocked when he said that he turned the offer down. What?! I asked why. He just shrugged and said he wanted to stay home. Like I said, home was safe. 

Alex and I were disappointed. We knew that Nik would have a great time if we could only get him to go. So I had a heart to heart with Nik. I explained that he needed to start getting out there more. You can't be afraid to live life outside of the house. We talked about Doctor Who traveling in the Tardis, and how he went on adventures. Life is all about living and exploring your world. 

Nik was nervous, but he said he would be willing to try. I assured him that it would be a big group. There would be plenty of familiar faces. And we could even pick out an outfit similar to the 12th Doctor (basically a black vest and pants, white dress shirt, and Dr Martin shoes).

The weekend before the dance was the season premier of Doctor Who. We had one of our theme days at the house, which basically means that I decorated the living room, we had food, hung out, and watched Doctor Who together. Good times! There was opportunity to continue our discussion about going on our own life adventures. We continued to support and encourage Nik as the dance approached. We wanted to acknowledge that Nik was nervous, but we also wanted to give him that not so gentle nudge to get him out of the house and with his peers.

On the day of the dance, he actually seemed pretty happy about it!  He was relaxed as he got dressed. We did have one little bump in the road when he declared that he would only go to the pre-party, and not the actual dance. So we talked a little. I told him to treat this as an adventure, pretend he was going into the Tardis and see where the night would take him. That seemed to do the trick, because he got dressed and was ready to go!

When it was time to leave, Nik wanted to pose in front of our Tardis door. He was so excited!

Unfortunately, I was down with a stomach bug, so Alex had to take over and get Nik to the pre-party. 

Ready to party!

The pre-party was being held at the home of one of the peer tutors. Alex took pictures there, but since there were so many young faces in the shot, I won't post. But it was awesome to see the peer tutors and special ed class all having fun together!

I will share this one picture that my friend texted me. This is Nik having a snack before the dance. 

Happy kid!

After the pre-party, the kids all headed out to the dance. Nik stayed for the entire time! Alex picked him up at the end of the night, and my kid came home with a huge smile on his face. In the end, he said that he was glad that he went! Yes! Victory, how sweet it is!  That's what it's all about. Keep pushing these kids out of the comfort zone, and encourage them all the way. Never give up!

While I'm on a Doctor Who kick, let me share some of the decorations we used for our Doctor Who theme day. I took a blue plastic table cloth, added some white card stock for the windows, recreated the signs from the Tardis, marked off some of door frames using a sharpie, and you get a cheap $3 Tardis!

Noah ready to watch Doctor Who!

Marshmallow Adipose in a pool of blue jelly babies. It's a Doctor Who thing.

Doctor Who cupcakes. Yes, I suck at applying frosting.

Table centerpiece, complete with bow tie napkins.  

The center piece, food tags, and banners (I didn't take photos) were all from an etsy seller named Creative Little Stars. If you ever have the need for printable party decorations, check them out!

The food, picked out by the kids, of course.

Getting ready for the show to start!

So there you have it. We managed to turn Doctor Who in to a life lesson.

A Day at Hong Kong Disneyland

Alex spent some time in China last month. He usually spends long hours working on these business trips, but this time he had one day all to himself. Since he was so close to Disneyland, I convinced him to go out and take pictures for me.

I'm just going to get right to the pictures. There is a cool train that takes you to the park. In true Disney fashion, they paid attention to the details.

There was a pretty cool water fountain at the entrance. 

The entrance is similar to the Disney parks in the US, right down to the crowds.

Now here is where Hong Kong Disneyland is totally different than every other Disney park. Lantau Peak can be seen behind the castle.

The buildings are smaller than the US versions of Disney Parks.

Tomorrowland has some unique qualities to it. And there is some construction going on. Alex was told that it was going to be a Marvel attraction.

Because he knew that I was going to be curious, Alex made a point to take pictures of the food.

You can see a crane where the construction is taking place.

Main Street facing the entrance of the park.

One of the rides that I was most eager to hear about was Mystic Manor. This is Hong Kong Disneyland's version of Haunted Mansion.  

Alex said that it was a fun ride, and unlike any other ride he has been on.

More theme park food.

And speaking of unique, Toy Story Land seems like a pretty cool area at Hong Kong Disneyland.

RC Race Car has a ride! Check out the que details below! 

Looks like a fun ride!

Toilets!

So many details!

And more food in Fantasyland. 

Sleeping Beauty Castle. It reminds me of the castle in Disneyland California. 

On his way out, Alex took a few shots of the parade. 

And he did some souvenir shopping for us!

We have such a long list of places to take the kids some day. I think the kids would love to visit that part of the world some day. If we could just get past the food thing.

Thank you, Alex!